[Guest: Virginia Smith] Becoming a Peacemaker

In a sermon not long ago, my pastor said, “It is not enough to wish for peace. We must work for peace by becoming peacemakers.”  I was in the midst of a conflict with a family member, and the word pounded like a drum beat on my conscience. Right there I vowed to take his message to heart and make peace.

A few days later a friend uttered a comment that left me fuming. I took a night to cool down, intending to call her the following day to discuss it. But that morning my Bible study lesson focused on Jesus’s parable about the Prodigal Son. The author highlighted the father’s words as he tried to soothe his disgruntled oldest son. She urged us to emulate that father and, “Seek peace by using your energy to build others up and strengthen relationships.”

Wait. Was she saying I needed to be a … peacemaker?

The author of the book went on to say, “Being the winner means you’re making someone else a loser. … Always aim for the mutual win.” In other words, being a peacemaker is more important than being right. Not an easy lesson, but one I determined to take to heart. I realized that keeping peace with my friend was more important than having my say.

It seemed the Lord was trying to get a point across, that perhaps I needed to focus less on winning arguments and more on keeping the peace. But the lesson goes deeper than these two incidents. It isn’t enough to struggle to shut my mouth when I feel offended. Being a peacemaker means more than trying to keep your cool. It requires a deeper commitment than striving for peace for just one day, or in just one instance.

Here’s an example. When I was a teenager my room at home was a disaster area. It was upstairs, out of my mother’s sight, so cleaning wasn’t high on my priority list. When I moved out on my own, I continued my sloppy pattern – until I wanted to invite a few friends over. Naturally I didn’t want anyone to see what a mess I lived in, so I cleaned. And cleaned. And cleaned. It took forever to get that apartment clean. I remembered something I’d heard years before: “Keeping up is easier than catching up.” It requires far less effort to keep a room neat and tidy than to clean up a colossal mess.

The same is true of peacemaking. It’s far easier to stay peaceful than to get peaceful. When I’m emotionally distraught, it takes a lot of effort to calm down and regain a measure of peace. I can’t wait until I’m embroiled in turmoil to don the peacemaker costume. Peace is not a mask I can slip on in times of conflict, because conflict happens all the time. Peacemaking is a way of life. It’s a character trait, an attitude that will guide every action I take, and will impact every relationship I have.

And not just in external circumstances, but within myself. When my heart and mind are guarded by the peace of God that transcends all understanding (Philippians 4:7), that peace will overflow into my relationships, my interactions, my attitude. Only then can I truly become a peacemaker.

 _{i Dr. Phil Hill, September 1, 2019, First United Methodist Church, Frankfort, KY
 ii Messy People: Life Lessons from Imperfect Biblical Heroes by Jennifer Cowart, Abingdon Press 2018}