I am a fraud.
We authors often joke about the voices inside our head–our characters. What’s talked about less often is the other voices in our heads. The voices of doubt. The voices that cry fraud, fake.
I’m a wife, a mother, an author, and an editor, which makes for quite the chaotic writing life. Looking at photos on Instagram of famous authors or tweets from writers with over 100k followers, it’s easy to think that writing is a glamorous life filled with travel and all the time in the world to write. Then, when I look at my own writing life, I become envious because I don’t have much time to write. And the voices in my head call me a fraud. I’m not a good writer. I’m not a good editor. I’m not a good wife. I’m not a good mom.
My life is a sink full of dishes, my son dumping yet another bowl of food on the already messy floor, a laundry hamper brimming with clothes, an untouched word document, leftovers or takeout for dinner again, and a mile long to-do list. It’s praying to God for strength to get through another day because I can’t imagine rolling out of bed after yet another night of no sleep.
Being a writer isn’t easy. Envying other writers is. These voices of doubt in our heads–they’re incredibly hard to ignore. But God has promised in Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (KJV). God has called me to be a writer, an editor, a wife, and a mom. But He didn’t call me to do these things and all the while wish for another life. He called me to do these things, promising that He would give me the strength to do them.
I am a writer. I am an editor. I am a wife. I am a mom. And through Christ, I can have the strength to be all these things and to excel in all of them.
Megan Gerig has been known as the hermit in Spare Oom to her family. She prefers reading to socializing, and by middle school, even the librarian had difficulty recommending a book she hadn’t read. Besides reading and writing, Megan enjoys baking muffins (and licking the bowl), gardening, and evening walks. She lives in a cottage in the midst of a busy city with her librarian husband and book-devouring son and is a freelance writer and editor at www.mgliteraryservices.com.
